Tag: internet dating

How to Handle the Subject of Getting Serious With Your Online Love

You and that special someone you met online and have decided it’s time to kick it up a notch and date exclusively. What should you do next? In the non-online dating world you’d probably both just turn down any new people who happened to ask you out. But Internet dating requires a different approach:

Discuss what “being serious” really means for both of you.

Internet dating is a tricky thing once you’ve met someone special. Perhaps you joined an online dating service because you wanted to meet someone special. On the other hand, your partner may have joined because they just wanted to get back in the dating game and meet new people. One individual may think it’s perfectly fine to continue browsing through profiles while they date someone seriously because they are “just looking.” Another person may think it’s fine to email other people as long as you don’t meet them out. There are definite rules for online dating etiquette, but unless you both are aware of them you may be headed in different directions and not even realize it. Communication is a key aspect for any relationship, but even more so when it comes to Internet dating. Open the dialog with your partner about where your relationship is really going so you are both on the same page.

Just because you take your profile down doesn’t mean your partner will.

Making a pact that you won’t email other people doesn’t mean one of you won’t still have your profile up. Perhaps your partner thinks it’s no big deal to have daters browse his or her profile, or even for them to browse other profiles, while at the same time dating you. Make sure you are both clear on what you should do to move forward with your relationship. Failure to do this could mean trouble down the road. Even if you both agree to get serious, never assume your mate is pulling his or her profile until you both discuss it and agree to do so.

Make sure you really do want to get serious.

One of the great things about Internet dating is the pure volume of people on the system. The greater the number of singles, the more likely you are to meet the right one for you. So at some point you will probably meet an individual who would like to date you exclusively. Don’t take this consideration lightly. Make sure you’re willing to fore go the chance to meet someone else in favor of seeing where the relationship is headed with your current mate. Remember that new people join online dating services everyday, and one of them could be your perfect mate. So don’t settle. If you aren’t absolutely sure you want to limit your dating time to just one person, tell them. Be honest without being hurtful, but indicate your reservations up front.

Let other people know.

If you decide to pull your profile, tell any of the folks you’ve been corresponding with. Remember that good online dating etiquette includes honesty and thoughtfulness.

A Guide to Internet Dating for First Timers

When people first start communicating online for the first time it can be a bit daunting. If they are unsure of themselves or are having second thoughts, then it is important for them to realize that they are not alone. The good news is, it does get easier, and everything starts moving along more smoothly. To help first timers get more enjoyment out of the online dating experience there are some tips below.

Honesty in Online Dating

Honesty is the best policy, and this should be from the beginning. The profile is where honesty should start as there’s no point in fabricating the truth. Most lies will get discovered on the first date which will ruin any chances of starting a relationship. Being honest will mean that there is a greater chance of meeting someone straight away who is truly compatible.

Online Profile Photograph

A photo is a must for the profile, and will get up to twenty times more emails than those profiles without one. Most dating sites allow the uploading of photos and it is important to keep on the honesty theme by uploading a recent photo. It is important for people to not use one from ten years ago when they had more hair or a flatter tummy.

For people who don’t have one to upload, it may be prudent to just have a friend take one with a digital camera. Profiles with pictures are more likely to be viewed. A photo not only shows everyone what the person in the profile looks like, but it shows that he or she has nothing to hide.

Safety in Online Dating

Safety is key and this can be done by not sharing any personal information. It is important to never use a real name on a profile and online dating site users should be encouraged to always create eye-catching usernames. Also, avoid giving an address or personal information to anyone who may get in touch initially.

At some point, it is likely that internet daters will find someone that they will want to speak with on the phone. For safety, it would be best to use a cell phone until a bond has been built with the other person. Once the people get to know each other, it becomes possible to relax and reveal more personal information.

Having Fun and Being Nice With Online Dating

It is important to always be nice; this isn’t the elementary school playground. Some people won’t be so nice because of the anonymity of the internet. If people meet someone at an online dating service that isn’t pleasant, they can easily block them from ever contacting them again.

The important thing is to have fun when looking for love. Be honest, upload a recent photo and take safety precautions when dating online. Looking for that perfect match could take some time so it is important to enjoy the experience every day. It is unlikely that anyone will click with the first person they meet, but they should not let this discourage them from continuing on their love quest.

Write a Great Profile Headline: Compose an Attention-Getting Online Caption

Think of your Internet dating profile as an online billboard. Each piece of it is valuable real estate. The headline of your profile may seem like a minor thing, but remember – this piece of the Internet dating puzzle is often one that, along with your picture, will first attract someone to you.

Consider these points in mind when writing your headline:

  1. Keep it short. A three-to-seven word sentence is best. Anything longer and your headline will be cut off in a profile search. Think about a succinct but catchy phrase that will draw someone’s eye to your ad.
  2. Choose subject matter that conveys a bit of your personality and perhaps mentions hobbies or interests indicated in the essay part of your profile. This will not only draw attention to your headline but also bring cohesiveness to your profile.
  3. Avoid negative phrasing. Many singles I work with go through the trouble of joining an online service and then place a phrase like “Nice guys finish last” or “Any decent men left in the world?” at the very top of their profile. This immediately gives a poor impression to the rest of the daters out there. Bottom line is if you start off negative, no one will want to go out of their way to contact you.
  4. Steer clear of headlines that are already overused on the system. Take a look at other headlines and you’ll begin to notice certain phrases repeated over and over. Expressions to avoid include “Why not,” “Giving this a try,” and “Let’s get together.” Remember, with Internet dating you have a very short time to capture a potential date’s attention, so use that space to say something about you. Instead of a bland, “Nice girl,” how about “Scrabble diva,” “Flea market mama,” or even “Never miss a Jet’s game.”
  5. Think about the things you like to do. It’s the quirky, unique parts of us that make us interesting. So take your time and thoughtfully consider which words might sum up your personality or give a glimpse into your life. Headlines don’t necessarily have to describe you, they could instead act as a conversation starter. Do you enjoy going to restaurants? Do you partake in a certain hobby? For example, “Let’s Meet at Tucan Joe’s” or the “Come With Me To The Art Fair” are specific and will immediately attract people who enjoy those types of places and events.

Factors Which Contribute To Internet Dating Success

The online dating success report which appeared in the “Crunch Time” section of the Times Magazine looked at the statistical likelihood of receiving contacts based on the profile photographs which singles chose to post. This was based on a survey undertaken by US dating site OKCupid.com. The dating service monitored the number of contacts and dating conversations which were generated in relation to their members’ profile pictures with rather interesting findings.

What the Internet Dating Survey Says About Singles

In general, a woman was found to be statistically likely to generate more new contacts if she:

  • Posted a MySpace style photograph
  • Chose a photograph which showed an “interesting” pursuit such as playing a musical instrument.
  • Posted a profile picture which showed cleavage.

Males were found to be more likely to increase their number of new contacts if they:

  • Chose a picture of themselves with an animal
  • Posted a photograph which exhibited their muscles

Factors Which Decreased Online Dating Success

For both sexes, those with a profile picture which showed the participant drinking had a reduced effect on the number of contacts received on average. Interestingly however, whilst men posing with animals were up to 50% more likely to increase their contacts, when women were pictured doing the same, this reduced their success rate by almost a quarter.

A similar incongruity was to be found in the reaction to photographs where the dater chose to use “eye contact”. Whilst this slightly increased the success rate for women daters, men who looked directly at the camera but did not smile, received fewer contacts.

For more information on how profile pictures worked for the members, see the fully detailed report from the data mining carried out which can be found on the OKCupid site blog.

Choosing a Dating Service

These dating statistics clearly suggest that photograph choice can affect dating performance but a carefully selected dating service may also hold the key to success. There are an overwhelming number of services out there so online daters need to think about the type of person they wish to meet and search for the site which is most likely to have these members.

There are lots of differentiated sites available – dedicated faith oriented dating services for example; if it is important to meet someone of the same ideological persuasion this might not be a bad place to start.

Online Dating Review Sites

There are a number of review websites available which enable research into a cross section of online dating services. This way, singles can find several possible sites which are most likely to meet their criteria. DatingSiteReviews.com allows the user to search through categories such as “Award Winning Dating” or “Wealthy Singles Dating” and covers sites across Australia, Canada and the UK.

Once a potential dating service is found, it is advisable to find out as much as possible about the site before signing up. The UK based onlinedatingtips.org gives the following advice: “Always read the Privacy Policy, About Us page, and the FAQ page. Each of these will give you a good look into the philosophy of that service.”

Free Online Dating

Finally, whilst it may not be the key to dating success, how much singles wish to pay for their service needs to be a consideration; many online dating services offer individuals the opportunity to sign up for free but, to actually view contacts and start dating conversations, a member will more often than not have to pay a fee. Thus when viewing potential sites, online daters should make themselves fully conversant with all the financial aspects of the service prior to signing up.

Convenience, Security and Selection When Using Internet Dating Sites

For those unsure of online dating, the negative aspects such as honesty and cost prevent them from exploring this method of introduction and meeting new singles. Internet dating can be an easy and fun way to interact with new people and even find someone special. Here are a few of the “pros” of online dating.

Log On Anytime

Today, most daters have an extremely busy schedule. So it should come as no surprise that many of them prefer the flexibility that online dating provides. Singles can come home from a long day at work or night out on the town with friends and log on to see their matches and emails of interest. They don’t need to put the rest of their life on hold just to meet new people.

Double Blind Email System

Daters don’t have to give out their real name, last name, email address, or any other personal information with the double blind email system most Internet dating sites provide. This means that singles can log on, send emails, and get to know someone new without jeopardizing their own personal safety. Daters can take their time in revealing information about themselves, which makes the process of getting to know each other easier and more comfortable.

Coffee Dates for First Meetings

The first time singles meet a new date, it can be so nerve wracking they may not be showing their best self. But with the invention of coffee dating, singles can agree to meet someone for an hour in a relatively safe environment. Singles can arrange for the end of that first meeting in advance, which eliminates the awkwardness of telling a date it’s time to leave.

Wide Selection of Singles

Internet dating dies are flooded with so many different types of people that singles are sure to meet at least a few people of interest. A large cross-section of people are represented so even those individuals with the pickiest of tastes are able to connect with someone. Moreover, singles are likely to meet someone new that they live or work by, but for whatever reason was just never able to meet in person.

Blocking Bothersome or Creepy People

Like any form of dating, there are bound to be one or two people that bother or creep out their dates. Anytime singles meet new people, they are putting themselves in a vulnerable position. To help put singles at ease, many dating sites offer the ability to block a profile. If someone makes the single feel uncomfortable for any reason, they can prevent the person from contacting them or viewing their profile.

Relatively Inexpensive Way to Meet New People

In many cases, Internet dating is just a few dollars a month for a membership. By contrast, other singles activities, like going out to bars, hiking, taking a class, or even hiring a matchmaker, can be much more costly. Many sites offer specials for three or six-month packages, making it easy and cheap to meet someone new.

People today tend to hear the more negative points of online dating which sometimes overshadow the positive points. Negativity seems to catch the attention of the news media and therefore it gets more attention. But the points in this article should offer proof to singles still unsure about online that it is an easy and safe way to meet someone special.

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